The Left Side of the Moon

Explaining God to my Kids

I had the following conversation in the car with my boys the other day. Hopefully, I haven't said anything to offend here. And obviously, this isn't word for word. My memory isn't that good and it's paraphrased.

LT: How old is God? Is he one hundred?

Me: God is much older than that. At least thousands of years old. Nobody knows how old God is. He made the world. He was here before anything else.

LT: Is God alive?

Me: No. God is not alive and he's not dead. He's not a person. He's just God.

T: But God was alive once, right?

Me: No. God was never alive. Jesus was alive. He was God's son.

LT: Oh, so God is Jesus's son?

Me: No. Jesus is God's son.

LT: Is there only one God?

Me: Yes and no. Most people you know will tell you there's one God because they're Christian. But there are many different types of religions and some people believe there is more than one God. Most of those religions are older, but some people still believe in different gods. The Greeks and Romans believed there were all different gods - a sun god, moon god, god of love, god of war. They had gods for everything. And the American Indians believe in lots of different gods too.

    T, do you know what we call a religion that only believes in one God?

T: No.

Me: That's monotheism. And religions that believe in more than one god are called polytheistic. So there's monotheism, and polytheism. Most people that we know are Christians and the are monotheistic. And Christianity is made up of different religions too. Most people we know are Catholic or Protestant, but there is also Judaism and Islam. Catholics and Protestant are similar in what they believe. Jewish people also believe in God, but they do not believe that Jesus was God's son. People who believe in Islam are called Muslim. They believe in one God too, they call him Allah, and they believe in the Bible, but they also have another holy book called the Koran.

    And these are just the Christian religions. There are all different kinds of religions - Buddhism, Hindu and many others.

LT: So there's lots of gods?

Me: Most people we know believe in one God, and they will get angry if you say there is more than one.

T: Why will they get angry?

Me: Because people want to think that what they believe is right. Lots of religious people think that their religion is best and that everyone else should go to their church. Not everyone, but lots of people. So you have to be very careful what you say about God, religion and church around other people, especially people you don't know very well.

    This is why Mommy doesn't like religion very much. Churches do lots of great things, like soup kitchens where they feed people who are poor and don't have a home, they raise money for people who are sick. But they do some bad things too. Sometimes they're mean to people who don't believe what they do. And sometimes they even convince people to go to war and kill people who don't believe in their religion. Many, many people have died because of religion. I think we should be able to have all the good parts of the church without all of the bad parts.

T: I never knew that.

He has an excuse. He's only eight.

Don't you wish you had time to prepare for these huge, existential conversations with your kids? I mean, it's not like I haven't given this topic some serious thought, and have some historical and religious knowledge to explain this. But I would have done some reading the night before if I'd known I was going to give a twenty minute lecture on God and religion the following day.

Palm Sunday

I went to church this past Sunday. Now, it's not like I haven't had reason to step in a church in the past decade or so. I've been to weddings and funerals, a first communion. God hasn't seen fit to strike me down for crossing the threshold or anything. Of course, that very well may be because there isn't one. But this past Sunday Blackstone decided to check out one the local churches and I decided to go with him. While our views on religion may seem, on the surface, to fall on opposite sides of the fence. In reality, the difference is almost negligible. Our views, feelings are almost completely in parallel, except he believes in God, and I really don't. I'm willing to allow that no one can know the truth, but that's about as far as I'm willing to go. I'm not sure I'm right. I don't understand how you can be sure you're right. But another difference between us is that he likes going to church. He likes the structure of it, and finds the experience relaxing, even if he does find disagreement with most of the same issues I do. I, on the other hand, find church completely unsettling.

We went to a local church where we know many members of the congregation. These are people I see every week. Truly wonderful people that I am happy to have in my life. But I sit next to these people in a church and I feel so conspicuous, so out of place, so unbelievably uncomfortable. It's about as much fun as a root canal. It reminds me of Hawthorne's short story Young Goodman Brown, where the guy is lured out to the middle of the woods and realizes he and his wife are being indoctrinated into this Satanic cult that the entire town belongs to, but he refuses and the rest of his life has to live in his town, his own home, as an outsider. A functioning member of the community, a husband, who now has to spend his life with this unsettling feeling, not knowing if what happened was just a dream or if the entire town belongs to this cult and he is, underneath all the day-to-day on-goings, really on outcast. Yeah, that's kind of how I feel at church, except swapping Satan for God, night for day, and the woods for a church. But that feeling, that you're all alone while surrounded by people, that everyone else understands, everyone else belongs and you don't. Oh, the theme is still the same for me. I feel like I'm sitting there and either I have completely lost my mind, or everyone else in the building has. We can't both be right, can we? But life just isn't that black and white. We have to allow that we both can be right, which goes against all logic, and is enough to drive me completely batty.

What I do miss about not going to church, is the coming together of the community. What I don't understand is why we can't have that without God and the Bible. This confuses the hell out of Blackstone. How do you have church without God? I don't know that we'd have to call it church, but why do we have to have God to bring a community together to do good works, support and help one another, remind one another about the important things in life, like love and kindness, peace and charity. I appreciate the moral education the church can provide to children and the moral compass it can be for adults. What I hate is how it's deemed necessary to praise God, shout out to Jesus, and read the words of long dead white men as if they were the words of God. I don't see why we need religion to be good people. I don't understand why we need to have our behavior rewarded with heaven or condemned to hell for motivation as to doing the right thing. Can't we just do the right thing because it is the right thing? Couldn't we still have the Ten Commandments without God and the Bible, just because it's the right way to live? Well, maybe not all ten of them. We'd have to drop that one about the idols and having no other gods. That should just make it easier. Fewer to remember.

Granted people need structure, guidance, rules and enforcement. It is human nature to look out for you and your own before all others. We have a government, laws and jails for that. I believe that without order, without law, the world would fall into chaos. I just don't believe that the same is true for God and religion. I know there are many other people that have studied the basic history of religion, how it originated to explain what the science wasn't there to explain yet. I know other people accept the theory of evolution and the Big Bang. What I don't understand is how so many of these people sit in a church and don't feel as alone, confused and scared as I am. Not by the fact that I don't have a path, that my soul is in turmoil, but because I most assuredly am not. I'm not just uncertain that I'm not like them, I'm positive to the center or my being that I'm not. It scares me because I know what I believe, because I feel so alone. Because at any moment I'm waiting for their eyes to glaze over, for them to tie me up and carry me to some god forsaken place in the woods where they do away with all the non-believers.

And many of you, my good friends and readers, lord knows what you think of me now. I do not think you're crazy. I do not think you're brainwashed. Which means I have to allow that these other wonderful people in my community, they're not going to declare me a witch and burn me at the stake. I can breathe a little easier now, well, at least a little easier than Young Goodman Brown, anyway. My center has been shaken a bit lately though. I'm telling myself it's good to be shaken a little now and then. The growing always comes with discomfort.

Re-Evaluating

We had our book club on The Faith Club last night and our conference call with the authors. It was so wonderful speaking with them. Unfortunately Suzanne disappeared early on, we're not sure what happened to her and Ranya could only speak with us for about fifteen minutes. But they were both enlightening to speak with. Priscilla talked with us for an hour and we had a great discussion. She rocks. They are continuing their work of spreading the importance of inter-faith discussion and have been touring the country speaking with groups and doing talk shows. We discussed how frustrating it can be to deal with people who cannot accept the diversity of religion, that believe only their view is the right one and everyone else is wrong. I can only imagine. I avoid such people like the plague.

I've already written a couple posts about my experience reading the book. I've also had quite a few discussions about religion over the past few months. My view on faith, religion and God are really not that much different from Priscilla's, who defines God in loose terms. I've found that there are many people who do. As one person said to me, she doesn't believe in "God the guy". I guess I'm still very uncomfortable with the word God. I've always thought that not believing in God, not going to church or taking communion, not following the tenets of a particular religion was the definition of an atheist. But it seems that a lot of people would disagree with me. I'm not sure what to do with that. Bookgirl asked me why I don't consider myself agnostic, and my immediate answer was that I'm not confused about my beliefs, I don't question them. But I have been thinking about whether my answer was a viable one. I looked up the definition on Wikipedia and while I certainly agree that knowledge of God or gods is unknowable, I don't believe. That is, unless you use a much broader definition of God, but then I'm still not comfortable with the term. But in reading through the information, perhaps a better classification of me is an Agnostic Atheist - the view of those who do not know of the existence or nonexistence of God or gods, and do not believe in them.

I love this poem that Priscilla included at the end of the book, she heard it read at a funeral. And while we may disagree on the existence of God, religious beliefs, which church to go to or whether to go at all, the existence of an after life, there are those aspects of life and death that we should all be able to agree on. I really wish we could focus on that. Priscilla mentioned to us during our call, that with all the loud, angry, prejudice religious voices out there, what we need is a passionate middle. The problem is that moderates often don't take the time or make the effort to be heard. She is so right.

Epitaph
by Merritt Malloy

When I die
Give what's left of me away
To children
And old men that want to die.
And if you need to cry,
Cry for your brother
Walking the street beside you.
And when you need me,
Put your arms
Around anyone
And give them
What you need to give to me.

I want to leave you something,
Something better
Than words
Or sounds.

Look for me
In the people I've known
Or loved,
And if you cannot give me away,
At least let me live on in your eyes
And not on your mind.

You can love me most
By letting
Hands touch hands,
By letting
Bodies touch bodies
And by letting go
Of children
That need to be free.

Love doesn't die,
People do.
So, when all that's left of me
Is love,
Give me away.

Live, Laugh, Love

In reading The Faith Club, I find myself most closely drawn to Ranya, who is Muslim. In reading Ranya's perspectives and conversations, it is astonishing to realize how far off so many of the common stereotypes of Islam and Muslim women are. Ranya is a modern and intelligent woman. She is Muslim, educated and does not wear a burka. After 9/11, she has felt conflicted about being a Muslim in America and has spent time researching her roots, considering if this religion was right for her and her children. And what she discovers is how much misunderstanding there is of Islam, and how twisted it has become in the hands of extremists. Ranya explains, "If Suzanne's God is the God of passion and love, and Priscilla's God is a judicial God of mitzvahs (good deeds or acts), then my God is a poetic rationalist who appeals to my mind and heart." A poetic rationalist. I love that.

Ranya explains that Islam does not preach that Muslims blindly have faith in God, instead it encourages people to look at the world around them and to see the presence of God all around them. I do find this argument persuasive. It has logical appeal. And of all the women's reasons for having faith, for being followers of their religion, Ranya's is the most persuasive to me. It is sad that while Islam preaches tolerance and acceptance of other religions, particularly of other Christian religions, it has been so contorted and grossly misused in the form of terrorism. As Ranya responds to questions on terrorists:

But we should all recognize that when religion is used as a rationale for aggression, a tactic of war or to justify a promise of land, then it is a politicized religion. It becomes a human ideology that has nothing to do with Godly values. That doesn't excuse all this craziness, but it is not anything particular or exclusive to Islam.

Amen. I couldn't agree with her more. And she has hit the nail on the head as to why I have such a problem with religion. Because all too often it does become part of a political agenda and is used as an excuse for war.

Like Ranya, I can look up into the stars at night and feel the power and the beauty in the world. I can feel myself humbled and belonging to something greater than myself. I find it irritating when people assume that because I don't believe in God, that I am not spiritual. It's rather insulting, actually. I just have trouble accepting that there is an all-knowing being up there somewhere in charge of it all. That just doesn't sit right with me. When I feel that presence of something more than myself, I believe that it is that I am one person in this world, and what is bigger than me, is the essence of all mankind and our connection to each other and the world we live in. Spirituality to me is recognizing that we are one small part of that whole and that we should at once be humbled at how small we are and empowered by how important it is that we are all part of that whole, that we all have some power and responsibility to shape the world we live in.

I know some people who would explain that even just that feeling of something greater than yourself, is enough to say you believe in God. Perhaps. If that is the way you see it, I'm not going to argue with you. And I'd rather that you didn't argue with me about it either, because at this point I don't even think we're having a religious debate, we're arguing semantics. Do you call that awe inspiring feeling God or not? It's just a word. Well, at least to me it's just a word. But I'm always trying to remind myself that to someone else, it's so much more than that, because I just don't get it and I never really have, and honestly, I don't really want to. I'm much less concerned about whether you're atheist, agnostic, Catholic or Jewish than if you're a good friend, an honest person and if you're the type of person who'll take a moment do something nice for someone else.

And I do believe in miracles. Just because I don't believe in God does not make a miracle any less of a miracle. I may believe in The Big Bang Theory and Evolution, but just because we can explain or theorize how life came to be on this planet through science, does it really make it any less miraculous? I don't think so. I may not believe that babies are gifts from the heavens, but that does not mean that I don't think that experiencing that moment of childbirth is not one of the most precious and amazing experiences that a person can have. Now virgins giving birth, bleeding statues and Mary's countenance in a pancake, those miracles, not so much.

I understand that many people would view atheism as a negative and pessimistic perspective of life, but I don't see it that way. I believe that all people are fundamentally and intrinsically linked to each other and being a part of that, living this life, is plenty of meaning and purpose. I put my faith in my family and friends, the people that I love, and even more largely in the goodness of humanity. I do not need to believe that there is some larger plan for me, or some higher purpose that I must serve. I simply believe that the here and now is the purpose, that being a good person, a good parent, a contributing member of this society, is the plan. That in the end, to say that you have lived life fully, loved with all your heart, and given as much of yourself as you could, laughed as often as possible, should be enough.

The Faith Struggle

Bookgirl sent me a copy of The Faith Club which I am finding fascinating and enlightening. It's written by three women - A Muslim, A Christian and A Jew. This is according to the title of the book, not really the way I'd put it myself, since they are all technically Christian and the "Christian" is Episcopalian. These three women originally come together to write a spiritual children's book, wanting to help children understand the commonalities in different religions. But quickly the children's book falls to the way-side as the women find they must confront the differences in their religions before they can find the similarities. While the discussions can become heated, and feelings are often hurt, the women continue their meetings which are serving an important spiritual need for each of them. The women are open, honest, intelligent and compassionate and truly want to understand and respect each other's faiths.

It is truly encouraging to me to see people of different religions coming together and searching for spiritual guidance from one another. One of the biggest problems I have with organized religions is the way they label and separate us. By belonging to one religion, you are automatically taking a stance - you believe this is the right religion, therefore everyone who is not the same religion as you is wrong. As an atheist, this is also true. And while a congregation is taught to come together and to value community, what community are they actually talking about? Your church and spiritual community, your neighbors, or do they mean something larger? Because this world would be a much happier and less violent place if we could just accept people from different faiths, without feeling the need to convert, save or annihilate them.

There are aspects of all of these women that I relate strongly to. My first and most immediate connection is to Suzanne, who is Jewish. I relate to her because she struggles with her faith. She is not so sure there is a God. It is very interesting to me that while she has this crisis of faith and even if she were to come out of this struggle an atheist, she would still be Jewish. I don't really think this could be said about someone of another faith. Judaism is different in that respect because it is not just about religion or going to church, it is culturally and biologically who you are.

I think most of us go through a religious struggle during our lives. Of course, there are some that don't. Some people just don't go to church and don't really spend time thinking about religion in any kind of depth. Others are born into a religion, accept that religion and that's the end of it. But it seems most of us go through the struggle at some point. Some struggle and change religions, some struggle and stay with their religion, and for some that struggle is constant. For me, that struggle happened at about fifteen. It happened pretty early probably partly because of personality, I'm not hot-wired to accept something just because someone told me to. Especially, not a funny-looking man who enjoys listening to himself talk way too much and wears a robe to work. Especially not him, and especially not my parents. But what truly caused my soul searching is what causes it for many of us - tragedy.

The ages of thirteen through fifteen were a very emotional and difficult time in my life, and not because of all the adolescent, coming-of-age drama we all go through. My grandfather died suddenly in his sleep due to heart failure, he'd had a triple by-pass a few years earlier but he'd been doing fine. He went to work, came home, went to bed and never got up. It was probably a blessing for him, but it wasn't easy for the rest of us. And both of my great-grandparents died slow, messy, deaths from cancer. I helped change the bandages when my great-grandmother got shingles. I watched them both lose their lucidity. My great-grandmother started talking to people who'd been dead for years. Once my great-grandmother passed, my great-aunt convinced my great-grandfather that my grandmother and my mother were after his money. In reality, what money? But he was a mean, paranoid man, who was losing his mind to age and the disease. We didn't see him at all in the few months prior to his death. The house still went to my grandmother. I know my great-aunt tried to get her hands on it, but since my great-grandfather was actually my step-great-grandfather, the house had been in my great-grandmother's name, and passed as she had requested to my grandmother. My great-grandmother had been widowed rather early in life after having her children. She managed to raise her kids and start her own sewing business with her brother during the Great Depression.

I still remember walking into that house after the funeral. It was empty - not a piece of furniture, not a plate, not a photo album. My great-aunt couldn't get the house, but she took everything in it. I couldn't believe a person could be so cold and cruel. As far as I know, she didn't have any motivation to behave this way. This was a woman I spent holidays with, who was family. I had sat on her lap. And what was most infuriating to me, was a woman in high esteem at our church. Her son, my second cousin, was the organist. She was there every Sunday and was supposedly this wonderful, humble, Christian woman. In contrast, my grandmother did not attend a church. She was a school teacher and volunteered much of her time to a thrift shop located at another church in the area, but she never went to church and never discussed religion. I've never really thought about it this way before, but given a choice - which woman's foot steps would you follow in? I really should follow my grandmother's example and start doing more volunteering.

I wondered through all the death and suffering, seeing my great-aunt at church and watching her turn the other way, where was God in all this? How could a woman so mean, petty, material and vindictive, be seen as a good Christian woman? Why did people assume that going to church meant you were a good, moral person? It just all seemed so hypercritical. So this was just the perfect timing for me to begin my confirmation classes.

At this point, our pastor had left and been replaced with a woman. She was a wonderful woman and was patient through all my questions over the year (normally it takes two years of classes, but somehow my mother convinced them to let me in late). It was encouraging to me to make my confirmation under a woman. It is one thing to know your religion allows female pastors, it is another thing altogether to have a female pastor at your church. But it was not enough to convince me in the existence of God or to want to be part of a church community. When I finally stood in front of the congregation and made my confirmation, my struggle was over.

Where are the Women?

Once upon a time there were women, and those women found mates and became mothers. As such, women were viewed as creators, as givers of life. There was Mother Nature, Mother Earth (Gaea), Athena, Aphrodite, Hera and many other female goddesses. There were also male gods and in some religions, like Greek mythology, the leader of the gods was male. But there were many female goddesses and they held a strong, prominent place in religion. And then along came the Roman Catholic Church, and there was only one God and He was male, and the women all but disappeared from religion.

I take major offense at the role women are given in the Bible. There is the lovely Eve who allows sin into the Garden of Eden. There is Mary Magdalene, was she a whore or wasn't she a whore? In some cases referred to as a devoted disciple of Jesus, aren't most of us conditioned to think of her as a prostitute? And then there's the pure and innocent Virgin Mary who I find more offensive than Eve, the bringer of sin, and Mary Magdalene, the questionable whore. There's nothing virginal, serene or innocent about being a mother and I resent motherhood being personified that way. Being a mother is hard, bloody, back-breaking work. It is not happenstance that the early religions related nature and earth to women, it was common sense. Women brought life into the world, it only made sense that the concept of "Creator" was female.

I'm no expert on religion, but I truly believe that Christianity is a religion created by men, for men. This is one reason I found "The Da Vinci Code" so compelling. Now I know it's a work of fiction and I certainly don't take it as fact. But doesn't it make a certain amount of sense? I love the concept that there were women playing an important role back in the day and that it was purposely and consciously taken away from us. Now maybe Mary Magdalene was a prophet and maybe she wasn't, maybe she had Jesus' baby and maybe she didn't. Honestly, those theories are only mildly interesting to me. What I find exciting about the novel is that it brings women back into the forefront of religion. Gives us back a little of the power that was stripped from us.

I loved "The Red Tent" for the same reason. It takes the biblical story of Jacob and his family, told in the voice of Jacob's daughter Dinah, and expounds on it giving the woman's perspective. Dinah is mentioned ever so briefly in the Bible. I'm not about to go look it up, but I believe it's only a few lines that state she was raped by the son of the ruler of Egypt. In the novel we get the whole back story of Dinah, the women that she comes from, the mother and midwife that she becomes, the love and loss she experiences in her life. It's the story or type of story the Bible seems to be so sorely lacking. One that shows a woman and her strength. Now, I suppose you could argue that "The Book of Ruth" does this, but really it seems more a story of how loyalty is rewarded than one that is about women and their strength. And this is just one story in the Bible.

What I'd really like to see in the Bible is an equivalent to the Greek goddess Athena. Athena, daughter of Zeus, goddess of wisdom, war and weaving. I want to see a strong, intelligent woman who plays an important role, a prophet perhaps. A woman who is unquestionably female but also strong and smart and fierce. But alas, this is only a hope, a dream, a fairy tale ending that does not exist.

Six Year-Old Logic

Now I know all parents think their kids are geniuses, but sometimes my Trouble astonishes me. His conviction about ideas and concepts, I never remember being that sure of myself as a kid. I may be an atheist, but Trouble is not. He believes firmly in God, heaven and hell. When my grandmother passed away last year I spent time considering how I would explain this to him, but I needn't have worried, he didn't need anything explained to him.

Our exchange went something like this.

Me: Mooma passed away yesterday. She was very sick and her body was old and she died.

Trouble: So, she's in heaven now?

Me: Well, some people believe that. Mommy doesn't, but alot of people do. And if that's what you believe then that's okay.

Trouble: Yes, Mooma's in heaven and she'll be very happy there with the angels and I think she can see me.

Me: Yes, I'm sure if there's a heaven then Mooma's there and I know she'll be watching over you.

Now, this only goes to prove how strongly entrenched in Christianity our culture is. I know some of this comes from my mother-in-law, but I think a good deal of it also comes from television, school and other kids. He hasn't learned this from me. Really, my reaction was that this went pretty well. He gets to have the rosy-colored heaven and I didn't have to compromise my beliefs and lie to give it to him.

Fast forward almost a year. My husband went to a wake a week ago. I explained this to Trouble when he asked where his dad was at dinner and we had the following terrifying conversation.

Trouble: So, the people at the wake, they'll be sad that she's dead?

Me: Yes, people can be very sad when someone they love dies. We miss them alot.

Trouble: Well, if they're sad then they should just kill themselves and they can go to heaven too. Then they'll be with her again.

Me: No!!! No one should ever kill themself. Remember, mommy doesn't believe in heaven. Mommy believes that when you're dead, that's it, you're dead. And the people who believe in heaven think that you can't go to heaven if you kill yourself because killing yourself is a bad thing to do and they won't let you in.

Trouble: Oh, okay.

I couldn't believe he took the idea of heaven that far. I understand his logic though. I mean, it makes sense doesn't it? If someone you love dies and goes to this wonderful, happy place in the sky, why not go with them? I couldn't believe heaven lead to this scary conversation about suicide with my six year-old. It's just one of the many conversations I've had with him that I was not prepared to have.

Why I'm an Atheist

First and foremost, religion doesn't make a whole lot of scientific sense. An all-knowing omniscient being that lives in the sky? I don't see it. People do not walk on water. I have never witnessed a person wake from the dead unless revived through medical expertise. Virgins are not mothers unless they came close enough to losing their virginity and were very unlucky. I am a scientific thinker and believe in things that can been seen and touched and proved.

I also have a big issue on taking a concept on faith without question. Because what I've had explained to me on many occasion is that I should just have faith and believe anyway. That me, a lowly and flawed human, should not question God. This is how the Holocaust happened in my opinion. That's what can happen when people accept beliefs without questioning them.

I was not raised an atheist. I was raised in the Lutheran Church, the Protestant religion that most closely resembles Catholicism. It was in making my confirmation in the church that I came to the resounding decision that I was an atheist. I was the top student in my confirmation class. I did all the reading, participated in all the discussions and asked the most questions. But the truth was that I couldn't accept the answers I was given. I made my confirmation, and then never stepped foot in a church again except for weddings and funerals. I was fifteen years-old at the time.

I raise this issue not because I'm trying to convince others that religion is a bunch of nonsense. Actually, I can see that it serves a huge purpose in the lives of many people and in the community. I bring this up because it is a huge factor in my life. While I am at odds with many of the stories of the Bible, I do agree with the lessons and morality that they teach.

And while I'm bringing up the Bible, I'll come clean and admit that no, I have not read the whole thing cover to cover and I have great admiration for anyone who has, my husband being one of those people. It's a daunting task. But I have read the more popular psalms and books, I even had to teach a number of them as an English teacher. Have you ever tried to teach the Bible as literature to a tenth grade class? I'm not sure who hated it more, me or them. I didn't hate it because I'm an atheist. I can appreciate the Bible as history and literature, I just can't accept it realistically. I also think it's important to research a topic before rejecting it. I hated it because they hated it.

But the problems I encounter most often as an atheist are as a parent. How do you teach the lessons and morals without the church and the Bible? How do you explain death to your child without God, heaven and hell? It can also be a difficult thing to explain to new friends when the question arises. It's not something I lead with in meeting new people. People can accept that you're a different religion, they can even accept if you're agnostic, but when you tell them you're an atheist they start to look at you funny. Like they think God is going to strike you down while you stand there in front of them and they might be caught in the cross-fire.

Atheism is an issue I find both a blessing and curse in my life. I don't have questions about faith and forgiveness. I am not tortured by confusion and indecision or guilt (at least not religious guilt). But it does create many challenges in my life, both personally and as parent. Religion, and Christianity specifically, are so dominant in our culture that when you reject them there are consequences.